Each month I post an update called Tuning In on what I'm up to and ideas for grounding, connection, and discovering vitality in your life. Most of the links on this post are informational only, but a few are affiliate links that help me keep up my website. Events: Facilitating: Center for Chronic Illness - Web-Based Rare Chronic Illness Support Group Tuesday April 5th, 2022 at 4pm PST Center for Chronic Illness - Living with Thyroid Eye Disease Support Group Tuesday April 5th, 2022 at 6pm PST Center for Chronic Illness - Living with Cystinosis Web-Based Support Group, Tuesday April 19th, 2022 at 4pm PST Center for Chronic Illness - Caring for Loved Ones with Thyroid Eye Disease, Tuesday April 19th, 2022 at 6pm PST National Days: April 1st is April Fool's Day April 2nd is World Autism Awareness Day April 5th is National Library Workers Day & National Deep Dish Pizza Day April 11th is National Pet Day April 15th is National Tax Day & Good Friday April 17th is Easter & National Haiku Poetry Day April 22nd is Earth Day & National Day of Silence April 27th is National Administrative Professionals' Day April 29th is Arbor Day April 30th is Adopt a Shelter Dog Day National Weeks: April 3rd-April 9th is National Library Week National Months: National Autism Awareness Month National Parkinson's Awareness Month National Poetry Month Sexual Assault Awareness Month Dear Valued Community, This is a strange time in our history. We are in another valley of the pandemic. There is the possibility of more peaks, but we are unsure what that will look like. To me, the ground feels both unstable and stable at the same time, which is probably the best anyone can hope for at any given time. How are you managing uncertainty right now? With gratitude, Kerry Nervous System Healing: Ideas for Grounding: Many associate April with rain. Probably from the well-known saying April showers bring may flowers. The image of light falling rain is a resource I frequently use in grounding. Imagine in your mind's eye water slowly falling from the sky, notice how it feels in your body. The next time it rains near you, take a moment to look out the window and watch it fall (or better yet, go outside and feel it fall) and take it in with all of your senses. Ideas for Connection: Perhaps you've heard of the phrase "Don't let perfect be the enemy of good." This applies to connection as well as most things in life. People are flawed. We all have wounds that show themselves in relationships. Expecting the people in your life to be perfect or behave perfectly will result in fewer and fewer relationships. Instead practice acceptance and grace for others' imperfections and it will translate to acceptance and grace for your own imperfections. This of course does not apply to patterns of abusive or toxic behavior, but people will let us down and also bring us up when we least expect it. Ideas for Creating Vitality: Similar to being cautious about expecting perfection in our connections, be cautious about how perfectionism is stifling your vitality. Contrary to how many of us think, vitality does not arise from achieving a state of perfection. Vitality comes from small daily moments of engaging with things we enjoy or small daily moments in which we are moving closer to our desires. The winding, spontaneous path is part of what makes it vital. Why grounding, connection, and vitality? Because these are the ways we regulate the nervous system. Spending intentional time in a regulated state allows our nervous system to wire in the direction of safety and aliveness. It's a big piece of the puzzle of how we repair the survival response of trauma. What I'm Reading Related for Therapy: Relational and Body-Centered Practices for Healing Trauma: Lifting the Burdens of the Past by Sharon Stanley "Relational and Body-Centered Practices for Healing Trauma provides psychotherapists and other helping professionals with a new body-based clinical model for the treatment of trauma. This model synthesizes emerging neurobiological and attachment research with somatic, embodied healing practices. Tested with hundreds of practitioners in courses for more than a decade, the principles and practices presented here empower helping professionals to effectively treat people with trauma while experiencing a sense of mutuality and personal growth themselves." What I'm Reading for Fun: The Keeper of Happy Endings by Barbara Davis "Soline Roussel is well schooled in the business of happy endings. For generations her family has kept an exclusive bridal salon in Paris, where magic is worked with needle and thread. It’s said that the bride who wears a Roussel gown is guaranteed a lifetime of joy. But devastating losses during World War II leave Soline's world and heart in ruins and her faith in love shaken. She boxes up her memories, stowing them away, along with her broken dreams, determined to forget. Decades later, while coping with her own tragic loss, aspiring gallery owner Rory Grant leases Soline's old property and discovers a box containing letters and a vintage wedding dress, never worn. When Rory returns the mementos, an unlikely friendship develops, and eerie parallels in Rory's and Soline's lives begin to surface. It's clear that they were destined to meet―and that Rory may hold the key to righting a forty-year wrong and opening the door to shared healing and, perhaps, a little magic." (I'm a proud member of the sloth reading club, so what I'm reading will not always change monthly) TV Show I'm Watching: Kevin Can F*** Himself on AMC+ Movie I'm Watching: The Power of the Dog on Netflix Song on Repeat: Anthem by Leonard Cohen Projects I'm Working On: Self-development book on trauma and worthiness, book of poetry, ongoing content for various publications. Considering next steps in career training—psychedelic assisted therapy, HeartMath training, biblio/poetry therapy training, or yoga teacher training. Poem: I Give You Back by Joy Harjo I release you, my beautiful and terrible fear. I release you. You were my beloved and hated twin, but now, I don’t know you as myself. I release you with all the pain I would know at the death of my children. You are not my blood anymore. I give you back to the soldiers who burned down my house, beheaded my children, raped and sodomized my brothers and sisters. I give you back to those who stole the food from our plates when we were starving. I release you, fear, because you hold these scenes in front of me and I was born with eyes that can never close. I release you I release you I release you I release you I am not afraid to be angry. I am not afraid to rejoice. I am not afraid to be black. I am not afraid to be white. I am not afraid to be hungry. I am not afraid to be full. I am not afraid to be hated. I am not afraid to be loved. to be loved, to be loved, fear. Oh, you have choked me, but I gave you the leash. You have gutted me but I gave you the knife. You have devoured me, but I laid myself across the fire. I take myself back, fear. You are not my shadow any longer. I won’t hold you in my hands. You can’t live in my eyes, my ears, my voice my belly, or in my heart my heart my heart my heart But come here, fear I am alive and you are so afraid of dying. Meme of the Month: Quote of the Month: "'Dear old world,’ she murmured, ‘you are very lovely, and I am glad to be alive in you.’” - L.M. Montgomery I'd love to hear how you are grounding, connecting, and creating vitality. What is helping you feel calm and alive? Or comment below on what books, podcasts, songs, shows, poetry, or quotes are resonating with you right now.
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Each month I post an update called Tuning In on what I'm up to and ideas for grounding, connection, and discovering vitality in your life. Most of the links on this post are informational only, but a few are affiliate links that help me keep up my website. Events: Facilitating: Center for Chronic Illness - Web-Based Rare Chronic Illness Support Group March 1st, 2022 at 4pm PST Center for Chronic Illness - Living with Thyroid Eye Disease Support Group Saturday, March 20th, 2022 at 9am PST Center for Chronic Illness - Parenting Cystinosis Web-Based Support Group, Tuesday March 15th, 2022 at 2:30pm PST Center for Chronic Illness - Living with Cystinosis Web-Based Support Group, Tuesday March 15, 2022 at 4pm PST National Days: March 1st is National Self-Injury Awareness Day March 4th is National Employee Appreciation Day March 8th is International Women's Day March 9th is National Registered Dietician Nutritionist Day March 10th is Women and Girls HIV/AIDS Awareness Day March 13th is Daylight Savings Time March 14th is Pi Day & National Napping Day March 15th is World Social Work Day March 17th is St. Patrick's Day March 19th is Certified Nurses Day March 20th Spring Begins March 21st is World Down Syndrome Day March 23rd is National Puppy Day March 24th is National Equal Pay Day March 30th is National Doctors Day & Manatee Appreciation Day National Weeks: March 6th-March 12th is International Women's Week & National School Social Workers Week National Months: National Women's History Month Multiple Sclerosis Awareness Month National Brain Injury Awareness Month National Social Work Month Dear Valued Community, March means the official arrival of spring if you live north of the equator. The time when flowers start to bloom and buds arrive on the trees. In Seattle, mid-March through mid-April is one of my favorite times of year—cherry blossom season. All over the city rows of trees sprout beautiful pink blossoms. While we continue to live with so much uncertainty, it is certain that seasons will change and the vegetation will grow. Take a moment to reflect on this transition and notice what it is like for you as the seasons change. With gratitude, Kerry Nervous System Healing: Ideas for Grounding: Because transitions have the potential to be disruptive, it is even more important to ground when the seasons change or Daylight Savings Time begins. Examine your routine for ways to stay grounded in it. Slowly adjust to the time change and slowly adjust your activity level from the quieter months of the winter to the more active months of the spring and summer. Notice what throws off your routine and how long it takes you to return to it. This will help you have a better idea of how much you can stretch it at any given time. Ideas for Connection: Here we go again. It feels like a Merry Go 'Round we can't get off. As we enter into the warmer months and the number of covid cases decline, we again hope that connection will be safer. I will offer some of the same advice as in spring of 2021. Move slowly. You don't have to see everyone and do everything all at once. Move in the rhythm that feels right and sustainable for you. Ideas for Creating Vitality: Spring is synonymous with vitality. Vitality is feeling alive and in spring so much is coming alive. This is a good time to tune into the vitality of nature. Maybe you want to try your hand at gardening or explore houseplants. Maybe it's more walks outside or even just opening your windows when the weather allows. Find small ways to connect to the life-giving properties of the natural world. Why grounding, connection, and vitality? Because these are the ways we regulate the nervous system. Spending intentional time in a regulated state allows our nervous system to wire in the direction of safety and aliveness. It's a big piece of the puzzle of how we repair the survival response of trauma. What I'm Reading Related for Therapy: Relational and Body-Centered Practices for Healing Trauma: Lifting the Burdens of the Past by Sharon Stanley "Relational and Body-Centered Practices for Healing Trauma provides psychotherapists and other helping professionals with a new body-based clinical model for the treatment of trauma. This model synthesizes emerging neurobiological and attachment research with somatic, embodied healing practices. Tested with hundreds of practitioners in courses for more than a decade, the principles and practices presented here empower helping professionals to effectively treat people with trauma while experiencing a sense of mutuality and personal growth themselves." What I'm Reading for Fun: Empire of Pain: The Secret History of the Sackler Dynasty by Patrick Radden Keefe "A grand, devastating portrait of three generations of the Sackler family, famed for the their philanthropy, whose fortune was built by Valium and whose reputation was destroyed by OxyContin." (I'm a proud member of the sloth reading club, so what I'm reading will not always change monthly) Podcast Episode with Impact: Maintenance Phase "Anti-Fat Bias" TV Show I'm Watching: Inventing Anna on Netflix Movie I'm Watching: CODA on AppleTV Song on Repeat: "Surface Pressure" by Jessica Darrow from Disney's Encanto Projects I'm Working On: Self-development book on trauma and worthiness, book of poetry, ongoing content for various publications. Considering next steps in career training—psychedelic assisted therapy, HeartMath training, biblio/poetry therapy training, or yoga teacher training. Poem: For Someone Awakening to the Trauma of His or Her Past by John O’Donohue For everything under the sun there is a time. This is the season of your awkward harvesting, When pain takes you where you would rather not go, Through the white curtain of yesterdays to a place You had forgotten you knew from the inside out; And a time when that bitter tree was planted That has grown always invisibly beside you And whose branches your awakened hands Now long to disentangle from your heart. You are coming to see how your looking often Darkened When you should have felt safe enough to fall toward love, How deep down your eyes were always owned by something That faced them through a dark fester of thorns Converting whoever came into a further figure of the wrong; You could only see what touch you as already torn. Now the act of seeing begins your work of mourning. And you memory is ready to show you everything, Having waiting all these years for you to return and know. Only you know where the casket of pain is interred. You will have to scrape through all the layers of covering. And according to your readiness, everything will be open. May you be blessed with a wise and compassionate guide. Who can accompany you through the fear and grief. Until your heart has wept its way to your true self. As your tears fall over that wounded place, May they wash away your hurt and free your heart. May your forgiveness still the hunger of the wound. So that for the first time you can walk away from that place, Reunited with your banished heart, now healed and freed, And feel the clear, free air bless your new face. Meme of the Month: A wish for you... Quote of the Month: "Like wildflowers, grow in all the places people thought you never would." - Unknown I'd love to hear how you are grounding, connecting, and creating vitality. What is helping you feel calm and alive? Or comment below on what books, podcasts, songs, shows, poetry, or quotes are resonating with you right now. Each month I post an update called Tuning In on what I'm up to and ideas for grounding, connection, and discovering vitality in your life. Most of the links on this post are informational only, but a few are affiliate links that help me keep up my website. Events: Facilitating: Center for Chronic Illness - Web-Based Rare Chronic Illness Support Group February 1st, 2022 at 4pm PST Center for Chronic Illness - Living with Thyroid Eye Disease Support Group Saturday, February 19th, 2022 at 9am PST Center for Chronic Illness - Living with Cystinosis Web-Based Support Group, Tuesday February 15th, 2022 at 4pm PST National Days: February 2nd is Groundhog Day February 4th is National Wear Red Day February 9th is National Pizza Day February 13th is Galentines Day February 14th is Valentines Day February 16th is National Pancake Day February 17th is National Random Acts of Kindness Day February 18th is National Caregivers Day February 20th is National Love Your Pet Day & National Muffin Day February 21st is Presidents Day February 29th is Rare Disease Day National Weeks: February 21st-February 27th, 2022 is National Eating Disorders Awareness Week National Months: Black History Month American Heart Month Teen Dating Violence Awareness Month Dear Valued Community, Though February is not the darkest month it may feel like the dark night of the soul. In February, it has been a long time since we have experienced warmth. Whether or not Punxsutawney Phil sees his shadow is arbitrary, we are likely to see six more weeks of winter either way. I recently cam across these words by Mary Oliver: "Instructions for living a life: Pay attention. Be astonished. Tell about it." As we continue to live in the time of global pandemic and we are in the final full month of winter, maybe we can simplify. If all we ask of ourselves is to pay attention, feel the associated feelings, and share it with someone, we are living a full life. With gratitude, Kerry Nervous System Healing: Ideas for Grounding: Sometimes we mistake the heaviness of life for feeling grounded. It reminds me of this moment from Friends... ...Learning to differentiate between unpleasant and pleasant sensations in the body is one of the most important parts of grounding. Heaviness can be suffocating or heaviness can be like the gentle pressure of a weighted blanket. How can you tell the difference? It is simpler than you think. The body already knows the difference. All you have to do is listen. Ideas for Connection: Sometimes connection is not just about spending more time with the people in our lives, it's about how we spend the time with the people in our lives. We can walk beside many people and not feel connected to them. Imagine the ways you can improve your sense of connectivity. Is there someone in your life you are able to be more open and vulnerable with? How do you define quality time? Are there ways to bring more of it into your life? Ideas for Creating Vitality: What do we do when we cannot ignite the flame within us? First we must acknowledge and validate our experience. The feeling of being stuck is incredibly difficult and the process of getting unstuck is also incredibly difficult. Next, tune into how many times you use the word "should" in your inner dialogue: I should eat better, I should exercise, I should do something productive today. Shoulds are not the path to creating vitality. Shoulds box us in, vitality expands. Instead, take stock of the small things that are life-giving to you: a sunny day, a friendly dog, a short walk, a warm bath. Vitality is found in the moments, not the hours and days. Why grounding, connection, and vitality? Because these are the ways we regulate the nervous system. Spending intentional time in a regulated state allows our nervous system to wire in the direction of safety and aliveness. It's a big piece of the puzzle of how we repair the survival response of trauma. What I'm Reading Related for Therapy: What Happened to You? Conversations on Trauma, Resilience, and Healing by Bruce D. Perry, MD, PhD & Oprah Winfrey "Oprah Winfrey and renowned brain development and trauma expert Dr. Bruce Perry discuss the impact of trauma and adversity and how healing must begin with a shift to asking 'What happened to you?' rather than 'What's wrong with you?'" Relational and Body-Centered Practices for Healing Trauma: Lifting the Burdens of the Past by Sharon Stanley My Somatic Transformation consultation group is re-reading this book and doing a study group. Every time I pick up this book, I discover something new. What I'm Reading for Fun: Empire of Pain: The Secret History of the Sackler Dynasty by Patrick Radden Keefe "A grand, devastating portrait of three generations of the Sackler family, famed for the their philanthropy, whose fortune was built by Valium and whose reputation was destroyed by OxyContin." (I'm a proud member of the sloth reading club, so what I'm reading will not always change monthly) Podcast Episode with Impact: TEDx SHORTS "Racism thrives on silence--speak up!" TV Show I'm Watching: Queer Eye on Netflix Movie I'm Watching: Encanto on Disney+ (Trigger Warning: generational trauma) Song on Repeat: Rise Up by Andra Day Recent Publications: Mindfulness Home Design: Expert Tips to Inspire Mindfulness at Home Projects I'm Working On: Self-development book on trauma and worthiness, book of poetry, ongoing content for various publications. Considering next steps in career training—psychedelic assisted therapy, biblio/poetry therapy training, or yoga teacher training. Poem: BLK History Month by Nikki Giovanni If Black History Month is not viable then wind does not carry the seeds and drop them on fertile ground rain does not dampen the land and encourage the seeds to root sun does not warm the earth and kiss the seedlings and tell them plain: You’re As Good As Anybody Else You’ve Got A Place Here, Too Meme of the Month: Quote of the Month: "In the depth of winter, I finally learned that within me there lay an invincible summer." - Albert Camus I'd love to hear how you are grounding, connecting, and creating vitality. What is helping you feel calm and alive? Or comment below on what books, podcasts, songs, shows, poetry, or quotes are resonating with you right now. |
WelcomeI'm Kerry (She/Her/Hers) and I am a licensed therapist, group facilitator, poet, writer, & speaker. This is a place to acknowledge and validate our suffering and trauma, while also learning how to turn toward aliveness and spaciousness. Categories
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