KERRY J HECKMAN, LICSW
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Tuning In 10.18.2021

10/18/2021

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Each week I post an update called Tuning In on what I'm up to and ideas for grounding, connection, and discovering vitality in your life. Most of the links on this post are informational only, but a few are affiliate links that help me keep up my website. 

Events:
Facilitating: Living with Cystinosis Web-Based Support Group, Tuesday October 19th, 2021 at 4pm PST
October is Adopt a Shelter Dog Month, LGBT History Month, National ADHD Awareness Month, National Book Month, National Bullying Prevention Month, National Domestic Violence Month, and Vegetarian Month 

Ideas for Grounding: Recently my husband Zach joked that our dog Scooter and I have a lot in common—we both like to go to our neighborhood coffee shop every day. In that moment I realized that humans and dogs thrive on routine. I love going to the coffee shop in the mornings, because it helps ground me in my day.

Ideas for Connection: Have you noticed lately that most of what we talk about with people is what we're streaming on TV? Then sometimes there's that twinge of guilt, like we should be talking about something else. I say lean into it. There are amazing things to watch and talking about it with others is a wonderful way to connect. It's one of the best ways to find out about new things to watch. My friends and I intentionally leave time to talk about what we're streaming during our video chats. 
​
Ideas for Creating Vitality: Have you visited an apple orchard or pumpkin patch yet? They are full of vitality and excitement for fall. It's something that comes around only once a year, so take advantage of the energy around it to lift your spirits.  

Why grounding, connection, and vitality? Because these are the ways we regulate the nervous system. Spending intentional time in a regulated state allows our nervous system to wire in the direction of safety and aliveness. In other words, it's a big piece of the puzzle of how we repair the survival response of trauma.
Picture
Mural in Snohomish, Washington

​What I'm Reading Related for Therapy: What Happened to You? Conversations on Trauma, Resilience, and Healing by Bruce D. Perry, MD, PhD & Oprah Winfrey

"Oprah Winfrey and renowned brain development and trauma expert Dr. Bruce Perry discuss the impact of trauma and adversity and how healing must begin with a shift to asking 'What happened to you?' rather than 'What's wrong with you?'" 

Relational and Body-Centered Practices for Healing Trauma: Lifting the Burdens of the Past by Sharon Stanley 

My Somatic Transformation consultation group is re-reading this book and doing a study group. Every time I pick up this book, I discover something new. 


What I'm Reading for Fun: The Bowl of Light by Hank Wesselman, PhD. 

"Ancestral Wisdom from a Hawaiian Shaman." 

(I'm a proud member of the sloth reading club, so what I'm reading will not change weekly.) ​

TV Show or Movie I'm Watching: Maid on Netflix 

Song on Repeat: "Thank You" by Alanis Morissette 
​​
Projects I'm Working On: Self-development book on trauma and worthiness, book of poetry, ongoing content for various publications. Considering next steps in career training—psychedelic assisted therapy, biblio/poetry therapy training, or yoga teacher training. 
Picture
Flowing Lake in Snohomish, Washington

Poem: 

At the Threshold
by Gunilla Norris

Stand at the kitchen door with me. 
Honor the heart of transformation. 
Honor your own heart
where everything is 
always changing. 
It is the very same dwelling. 

Pause at the door. 
Your heart needs this. 
My heart needs this time 
for recognition or it will go astray. 
It will forget to reach for 
its real joy...its true becoming. 

Pause at the door. 
This is good and necessary
for this is every room.
The world lives here. 
Pausing each day helps us know
nothing is outside of us. 

Honor that heart that can feel
the joy and the terror of
the world in you and in me. 
Only what is truly human
can walk this path, walk though 
and be constant. Bow to that heart. 

Hold my hand. I need you for courage. 
We become who we are together, 
each needing the other. Alone is a myth. 
The path leads through this door. 
I cannot go to the kitchen without you. 
Let us enter together.  
​
Meme of the Week:
Picture

Quote of the Week: "People who need help sometimes look a lot like people who don't need help." - Glennon Doyle

​I'd love to hear how you are grounding, connecting, and creating vitality. What is helping you feel calm and alive? Or comment below on what books, podcasts, songs, shows, poetry, or quotes are resonating with you right now. ​
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    Welcome

    I'm Kerry (She/Her/Hers) and I am a licensed therapist, group facilitator, poet, writer, & speaker. This is a place to acknowledge and validate our suffering and trauma, while also learning how to turn toward aliveness and spaciousness. 

    Kerry J Heckman

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